Par

So needless to say I got a 5 on the hole. But this was not until my other playing companion mistook my ball in front of the green for his. This is an awkward situation in golfing with strangers. You both watch where your ball goes and are confident that it will be there when you get there. You arrive a the same time and there is a pause that makes your glove sweat. That is why golfers mark their ball with pens and little designs. So they know when they have their own ball. Upon confirmation of my ball I said, "Where did you end up?", which is a golfer's way of saying, "Looks like you have no idea where your ball is, he he he!!" In this case, it was true. He never found it. So through the first hole, I had a par, and the Mullet Brothers had combined for a number that equaled the current temperature.

The next tee is much more relaxed. Especially if you have honors, meaning you get to hit first because you had the best score on the last hole. It's nice coming off a hole like that, set your ball on the tee, stand over it and shank it into the bushes on the left. Just as you were feeling like you might show these two jokers a thing or two, you get brought back to reality real quick. You think to yourself, why did I pull it left? Oh, because I have never had a lesson. This was a fun hole because after M1 and M2 (Mullet 1 and 2) had hit their shots we ventured down to the green, it was a par 3, to see if we could find my ball. Funny how quickly the wind changes on the course. I looked and looked and then M1 said, "Is that it by the sand trap?", I said, "If that is my ball, it's a miracle." Guess who was listening? It was my ball. So from a moment that looked to be dire, I proudly set to hit my second shot from 3 feet off the green, pin high. Now, I need to mention an important part here. The yard next to the hole where I thought my ball may have gone, is home to two bulldogs. I have never seen them before. They were pretty mean looking poochies. Well, as if they were trained, as I set over the ball, and made a couple of practice swings, each time I moved the club forward they would bark. I am serious. It was like a clip from American's Funniest Home Videos. I would bring the club back and just as I would move it towards the ball they would bark. For those of you that aren't aware, most professional golfers will have you killed if you have a loud thought during their swing. Maybe you remember that there was a golfer who's caddie threw someone's camera in the water hazard for taking a picture during the golfer's backswing. The golfer's name rhymes with Shyger Fluuds. Anyway, I swing to hit the ball and sure enough just as I came down on the ball the dog barked and my shot was flubbed into the sand trap. Both M1 and M2 said I should replace and rehit my ball. I am sure they were referencing Rule 31-5-99 stating that any dog bark, bird poop, jet flyby, leaf drop, angel getting it's wings incident that occurs during a downswing shall result in a replace and rehit. So I did, and with no dog bark this time I proudly hit the ball......back into the sand trap.